


Code Red

by social_reject



Category: 5 Seconds of Summer (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-15
Updated: 2015-12-15
Packaged: 2018-05-06 23:03:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,000
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5434133
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/social_reject/pseuds/social_reject
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Love wasn't something to be measured and figured out in laboratories, connections weren't supposed to be made through a computerized system that ran your finger prints. Love is crazy and sporadic, ever changing, morphing and shifting between people, taking it's time to wrap around you, to pull you in and under, to drive you crazy and keep you sane. Love is not a science. Which is why Calum had never subjected himself to looking at the match that lit up the screen when his prints were scanned. If he was going to fall in love, he wanted to do it on his own terms. Not with a suggestive nudge in the 'right' direction.</p><p>Even through the resistance Calum exudes at the idea of soulmates, he can't help the undeniable pull he feels towards his newest patient. He can't deny the fact that there is something so intrinsically compelling and familiar about the boy with red hair. And he most certainly can't seem to shake the broken pieces of a long forgotten memory from his mind.</p><p>A Soulmate AU</p>
            </blockquote>





	Code Red

**Author's Note:**

> It's been a long time coming for me to finally write some Malum, and of course, I had to make it soulmates, because if they're not soulmates, then I don't know who is. Anyway, I hope you enjoy reading it even half as much as I enjoyed writing it! :)

The sterile hospital air was suffocating to Calum, his tired feet stumbling out one of the side exits, taking a rather large breath in. He held it for a moment, filling himself with rejuvenation, the air crisp in his lungs, before he exhaled, his breath dancing in the dark night air. He’d started his shift only a few hours previous and he was already dead tired, having run all around the hospital trying to make up for the slack of the other employees.

He ran a hand through his mused hair, a sigh escaping his lips, his eyes fluttering shut as the silence of the night washed over his body. He was calmed fractionally, his usually tense body releasing, his shoulders rolling back as a cool breeze swept over him. The complete and utter aloneness of the moment had him reveling in the feeling of solitude, the chances of these moments happening very slim. He didn’t take them for granted, he soaked up the feeling with everything he had, his introverted traits sending small thank yous out to the universe.

It was moments like these that had Calum momentarily reflecting on his life; thinking of all the things that had happened to have him standing where he was. He’d wanted so desperately to follow his dreams, to pursue one of the only things that had consistently brought him happiness, but it was unrealistic. His parents had quickly shot down the idea of following his passions into the music world, giving him a precise reality check. It had indefinitely knocked him down a couple of pegs, his thoughts crashing down from the clouds into the tiled floor of the hospital. He’d hastily chosen nursing as a career path, not knowing where else to turn, and maybe it was a happy accident, because he couldn’t deny the fact the he was great at what he did, and more often than not he truly enjoyed it.

The moment of reflection was short lived though, a nagging reminder of his needed presence beeping at him consistently. He took one last deep breath in, his fingers curling around empty air, letting the absence of everything comfort him before he pushed the door open, stepping into the responsibilities that came with the job. He fully immersed himself in the environment, giving his all to his patients, making sure that their needs were met before they even realized that they needed anything. He loved his job, he was always a care giver, compassion running through him as naturally as the blood in his body.

He was caught up in reading a new patients chart, trying to familiarize himself with all of the details and needs that the patient may have, when something broke his attention away. A clattering of instruments fell to the floor, Calum turning so quickly at the sudden sound he was afraid he’d given himself whiplash, there fumbled Luke with a sheepish expression trying to collect all the fallen tools. Calum bent to help him, a small laugh escaping him at the exasperated expression on Luke’s face.

“You’ll get the hang of it in no time,” Calum assured, putting some of the younger and less experienced nurse’s doubts at ease.

“I’m just so tired, I can barely keep my eyes open,” Luke complained, picking up the last of the fallen pieces.

Calum discarded what he’d picked up onto the counter, Luke thanking him with a smile. He held onto that sentiment through the rest of the day, through the cranky patients, through the know it all families that insisted they knew more than Calum. Luke was a shining light in a dull hospital. He was insanely  happy he had befriended the gawky new comer, sure, he’d been a little clumsy and not very confident when he started, but Calum was sure he was going to shape up to be a fine nurse and even better friend.

When the time came for Calum to leave, he rejoiced in the fact as he stepped outside, racing to his car in his haste to get home. His thoughts were scrambled as he drove home, not particularly focusing on anything he might deem important. Eventually he pulled into the parking lot of his apartment complex and took the stairs two at a time, his keys jingling in his grasp. He unlocked the door quickly, swinging the door open and into some yet to be unpacked boxes. He knew he should take care of them, but whenever he got home, he just wanted to relax. So, he was unpacking leisurely. He’d rifle through a box at a time, sometimes getting caught up in all of the small treasures he had forgotten he’d brought with him from Australia.

It was a big move for him, around the world and into a city, transplanted from his suburban life to the hustle and bustle and excitement that Boston had to offer him. It’d been three months since he’d finished his schooling and gotten the job, his bass tucked away for the time being. It wasn’t that he didn’t desperately want to play it, to write the songs running through his head, but he just couldn’t. Not with how much time and dedication went into the job he had. Sometimes he’d find himself eyeing the instrument, with tired and heavy eyelids, he’d promise himself he’d play it the next day. It was always going to be the next day.

 He sighed, figuring he might as well attack some of the boxes while he was awake, a small feeling of claustrophobia settling in his bones as he looked at all that was left. It was getting cramped in the small apartment, between the packed boxes, the semi unpacked boxes, and just the usual clutter he couldn’t help but obtain. He randomly chose a box, his handwriting scrawled out in sharpie informing him it was ‘bedroom stuff’. He slid his key over the tape, not bothering to go to the kitchen to get a knife, and popped the top of the box open, an obscene amount of clutter and general junk stared back at him.

He picked up what was on top, a very lonely walkie-talkie, the red light blinking at him, somehow the battery managing to stay true. He couldn’t fathom why he would’ve packed this, but upon further inspection it seemed to him he packed just about anything and everything that he’d found in his room. He couldn’t even recall when he’d gotten the device, why he had used it, where it had come from. His memory was slipping away through a familiar nudge. It was almost as if he could see himself using it as a child, but his child self-felt like a stranger. He could recall it like he was watching through a one way mirror, Little Calum with the walkie-talkie in his clutches, his lips moving but nothing of auditory memory coming to mind.

He shrugged, throwing the device back in the box, pushing the box away from him with his knee, not much in the mood for unpacking anymore. To finish off his night he made himself dinner and crashed, his mind struggling to put forgotten pieces of an abandoned puzzle back together. He didn’t know why this whole walkie-talkie debacle was getting to him so much, but he felt as if he should remember it, that it was significant to his life someway- somehow. And maybe because he had thought about it so hard, he had dreamt of it, but it was hard for him to differentiate what was actually reality from what he thought could be.

*

“He scores! Touch down!” Luke roared, faking the crowd’s cheers as his paper soared through the imaginary goal posts, landing very close to Calum’s unwrapped lunch. They’d decided to eat in the staff room for lunch, bringing their own food, sick of what the cafeteria offered and not truly having enough time to go out for something other than grease.  

Calum laughed at the blonds enthusiasm, “That’d be a field goal there buddy.”

Luke stopped his cheering abruptly, an eyebrow cocked in confusion, “What?”

“You kicked it through the posts, that’d be a field goal and only worth one if it’s coupled with a touchdown or three if it’s on its own,” Calum explained.

“And what’s a touchdown worth?” Luke questioned.

“Six.”

“Then it was a touchdown,” Luke said adamantly believing his own lie.

Calum blinked slowly at him, shaking his head back and forth to emphasis how ridiculous that was. Luke only laughed and grabbed for the paper once more, setting up for another ‘touch down’. Calum kept to his lunch, eyeing the younger guy across from him, contemplating why Luke had all of a sudden decided to take an interest in football, and why if he was interested in it, wasn’t he taking the time to learn the basics. The answer hit Calum quite quickly as he looked at the shine of Luke’s eyes, remembering how he had basically skipped into work, a lovesick smile on his elated face.

“Alright, who’d you meet?”

“Huh?” Luke asked, his paper veering to the side as he was caught off guard. Calum picked up the paper and turned it over and over in his grasp as he waited for Luke to answer.

“Who are you crushing on?” Calum elaborated when it became clear Luke didn’t understand.

The blond blushed, dipping his head low to the table, “I just- nobody, no one, it’s nothing.”

Calum rolled his eyes, astronomical sass and disbelief in the action, he huffed out a laugh, “Sure. You met nobody and I’m suddenly the queen of England.”

“Cal,” Luke whined, his hands coming up to cup his pouting face. “Don’t.”

“Alright, alright. You don’t have to tell me. But- I can help you with this whole football thing if you want.”

“Really? You’ll teach me? That way Ashton won’t have to explain it all as we watch on Sunday.”

Calum smirked, the blond revealing more than he had intentionally thought to. Luke quickly clapped a hand over his mouth, his eyes widening as Calum laughed. It was always easy to get information out of Luke, he was horrible at keeping secrets, especially when he was excited, and Calum couldn’t quite think of a time he hadn’t been excited.

“Don’t worry I’ll teach you all you need to know before your date,” Calum said, an undertone of teasing in his voice, the word ‘date’ drenched with an artificial sweetener.

“Thanks,” Luke grumbled, Calum picking up on the tone of his voice. Luke must have been disappointed he’d let his little secret slip, but he was also blushing tremendously, his pale cheeks tinting an adorable pink as he bit at his lip, just the mention of the date having him squirming. Calum shook his head, the absurdity of being so flustered over a person eliciting a chuckle out of him.

“Think he’s the one?” Calum asked boldly, Luke quick to look up at him with wide eyes.

“You mean the actual one?”

Calum nodded as they fell into silence, both of them picking at their food as they got lost in their own thoughts, Luke taking his time to answer. Calum thought, that if anything was absurd, it was the whole notion of ‘soulmates’. Of finding ‘the one’ based on something seemingly impossible to tell. A hunch, a notion, a feeling. But then there was a science behind it, the answer held within your finger prints, but that felt only intrusive and set up. Conspiracies believe it was just another way for the governments to keep tabs on you, while Calum wasn’t willing to go so far, he couldn’t quite believe there was a science behind love. It just seemed impossible.

Love wasn’t something to be measured and figured out in laboratories, connections weren’t supposed to be made through a computerized system that ran your finger prints. Love is crazy and sporadic, ever changing, morphing and shifting between people, taking it’s time to wrap around you, to pull you in and under, to drive you crazy and keep you sane. Love is not a science. Which is why he’d never subjected himself to looking at the match that lit up the screen when his prints were scanned. If he was going to fall in love, he wanted to do it on his own terms. Not with a suggestive nudge in the ‘right’ direction.

“He could be,” Luke finally responded. “It certainly feels that way.”

“And what way is that?” Calum inquired, unsure how to accurately describe the feeling of soulmates. He had never experienced it before. He didn’t think he’d even ever come close.

“It’s hard to explain. Especially where we met only a few weeks ago. But there’s just something about him- about us. Something that makes me feel like I’m walking on air when I’m around him. Something about seeing him happy that automatically makes me happy. It’s not a perfect feeling, nothing is ever perfect, especially when it comes to love, it gets messy and rough, but at the end of the day just being on the receiving end of his smile makes it all worth it. I know you’re going to say it’s crazy, but, if love is anything, it’d be crazy.”

Calum quirked his eyebrow, an unexpected turn to Luke’s words bombarding him. They didn’t usually delve so deep into such meaningful subjects during their lunch breaks- that was usually reserved for when they’d both pounded a few drinks at the bar. Calum was a little surprised that Luke had managed to keep Ashton a secret for a few weeks, but that didn’t bother him much, they opened up to each other when they were ready. They had no time limits on their friendship.

“Have you checked your match yet?” Calum asked, negating to mention anything related to the feeling Luke had described.

“No, I don’t think I will. I don’t want to be told who to love.”

Calum nodded, that was one of the reasons why he and Luke got along so well. They were caught up in a system they refused to be a part of. It wasn’t much of a rebellion, they weren’t forced into knowing anything, but it did keep them bonded together in a world where it was taboo to not participate.

“And is Ashton okay with that?” Calum then asked, worried for his friends sake.

“Amazingly, yes. We just want to get to know each other,” Luke explained. “We want to explore these feelings uncharted.”

Before Calum could respond, before he could make up his mind in either shutting down Luke’s crazy notion or encourage him to follow this feeling, his signal of need was flashing at him. He excused himself, throwing away the remainders of his lunch and quickly stepping into the hallway where he was met with the sight of an incoming stretcher, a transfer in progress.

Once the stretcher caught up to him Calum followed behind, his eyes medically and contemplatively scanning the patient. He took in the tubes and wires connected to him, the swirling colors of bruises littering his skin, red bleeding through in forms of cuts and one particularly deep gash that had been sewed up.

The patients eyes were closed, dyed red hair falling across his forehead lightly and limply, as if everything on the patient was fragile; the bruise ridden body, the lifeless hair, the pale complexion to the skin. Vulnerability pushed its way through Calum, somehow seeing the patient so dull working its way through his otherwise usually detached emotions. Calum cared about all of his patients on a strictly professional level- he’d never been one to bring his work home with him- but something else was trudging its way through him. Something unidentifiable.

“Here’s his chart,” Ashley, one of the floors other nurses, said, handing Calum the clipboard once they’d wheeled the bed in, the patient undisturbed from the commotion.

“Jon Doe?” Calum asked as he quickly checked it over to make sure everything was in order.

“They didn’t find an ID on him, his phone was broken beyond recognition, couldn’t find an emergency contact,” she explained. “But he’s pretty lucky to be alive. I’ve seen patients in those types of crashes before. It could be a lot worse.”

Calum nodded, flipping the page of the chart, licking at his lips in thought. One very vital part of the chart seemed to be missing, “You haven’t printed him yet?”

“Systems down, tech says they’ll need another hour,” Ashley explained before nodding as a goodbye and walking out the door.

Calum lingered behind, wondering who this Jon Doe could be, and why in the world was it that the longer he looked at him, the more familiar he became. There was something trying to escape the back of Calum’s mind, a long forgotten memory charging its way to the forefront of his thoughts only to be road blocked. While the whole notion of using your finger prints to find your soulmate in a database was just crazy, the printing was useful in hospitals. If an unidentified patient was wheeled in, they could match prints in the system to find their identity, their emergency contact, and in some cases- their soulmate. Calum scratched at his chin as he took another look at the patient, his bruised up arms had tattoos, black ink contrasting with the pale skin an intimate sort of way.

Calum shook himself of his reverie, that intruding memory repressed as he spun on his heel and exited the room, making his way to grab what he’d need for printing. Sure, there’d be another hour until the system was up, but he could always get the prints now to save time later. It was a quick thing, with the patient still asleep and the process rather remedial anyway. Calum was done soon enough and headed off elsewhere, attending to patients in need. Once that hour was up though, he was quick to run to the computer, scanning the prints as fast as he could, the blue bar loading agonizingly slowly.

Luke passed him, a smile thrown his way as he entered one of his patient’s rooms, Calum tapping his fingers along the desk. He waited and waited, that blue bar ever so slowly inching its way to the finish line. Finally, once it was finished, the screen popped up an identification on the patient, a name, an address, an emergency contact, _and_ a soulmate match. Calum took in all the information slowly, taking his time to tediously write down all of the correct information on the chart. No longer would he have to refer to the patient as Jon Doe, but as Michael Clifford, a photo ID of him popping up on the screen. In the photo he was smiling, his eyebrows raised, his piercing glinting. In the photo he also had dirty blond hair, something more persistent trudging its way through Calum’s thoughts.

He pushed past it though, placing a call to the emergency contact listed, trying to keep his tone neutral. The conversation was almost immediately forgotten once he hung up the phone, his eyes flitting back to the screen in front of him. There was one last detail to be filled out, and while he felt it was intrusive, the paper asked for the information. His hand twitched slightly as he went to grab for his discarded pen. He couldn’t comprehend why he was feeling so guilty all of a sudden, why his stomach was twisting menacingly as his now shaking hands reached for the mouse of the computer. He took a deep breath in and held it, slowly letting it out a moment later, trying to persevere past this ungodly reaction he was having.

He moved on as best he could, moving the cursor over the soulmate match, hesitation rippled through him until he pushed past it and double clicked, a new window with the soulmates identification popping up. His own face stared back at him, his name in bold underneath the photo. His heart stopped, halting hurtfully until it thudded back to life and his blood was racing, coursing through his veins until he felt dizzy. He closed out of the window, a shake to his hands derailing the cursor for a moment. Something in his stomach clenched as he turned to look at the one way window, the patient- or rather Michael; his soulmate- still. Subconsciously he moved forward, his footsteps tiny and unpracticed, his knees with just a slight wobble to them as he stepped up towards the window. He looked on speculatively for a moment, his lips parting in wonder as he realized all this truly meant.

A million emotions were washing over him steadily, his mind and body going through the process of acceptance. Stage one; denial. He looked at Michael, his thoughts only filled with doubts, there was no way they were soulmates, he hadn’t actually clicked on the match, he’d just imagined it all. Stage two; anger. Not at Michael, there was no way he could be angry at Michael for this one, especially not when he was laid out so helplessly, so vulnerable. No, Calum was mad at himself for being so intrusive, for just _having_ to click on that daunting little button. Then stage three came and went just as fast, there was simply no use in bargaining. He skipped stage four, somehow not able to be truly sad at the whole ordeal as he looked in at Michael, something stirring inside his stomach, unbeknownst to him, a smile starting to lift the corners of his mouth. He made great pace into the final stage; acceptance itself.

Calum watched as Michael stirred, his battered arms shifting slightly, his eyelids fluttering open, the boy quickly coming to life after being so aggressively asleep. Calum knew he should go in there, merely for the fact that Michael should have someone present as he awoke, someone to explain to him what had happened. He watched as Michael was brought out of his sleepy daze, his eyes changing to alert, his body tensing at the unfamiliar situation. Calum swallowed down a lump in his throat, grabbed for Michael’s chart and sidestepped over to the door, his hand gripping the door knob unsurely. The cool metal of the door knob under his fingers was fractionally calming, his palms sweating and shaking as he turned the knob and pushed the door open, coming face to face; eye to eye, with his soulmate. It was silent around them for a solid few moments, the tension and the vulnerability around them growing and thickening, each taking the time to rack their eyes up and down the other, drinking in the sight, Calum letting his body and mind respond to the person in front of him.

“What happened?” Michael asked, a raw and scratchy voice coated with drug induced sleep greeting Calum. Michael had the epitome of morning voice, the gruff words, the hazy structure to the sentence, his lip pouted as he searched for an answer.

“You were in a car accident,” Calum said slowly, unsurely, not knowing how to word it all. Not knowing how Michael would react, basically, not knowing this stranger in anyway other than from the pictures on the screen. “But you’re going to be just fine. I’m your nurse, Calum.”

Calum took a small step forward as Michael pushed himself up onto his elbows, his inquisitive green eyes staring back at Calum. Uneasiness swept through Calum until Michael collapsed back onto the mound of pillows and sighed, his eyes fluttering closed. Michael let out the smallest of groans, no indication as to why; if he was in pain or tired, or whatever else it may possibly have been. Calum clutched at the charted clipboard in his hands, not knowing what to say, or if he should say anything at all. He felt out of his element, as if the walls of the hospital had been dragged down and he’d been thrust into an unfamiliar war zone. He stayed silent until Michael’s eyes sprang open once more.

Michael cocked his head to the side in thought, his lips trembled with words he didn’t get the chance to speak, the door opening stopping him short. Whatever Michael had been about to say was lost as a stranger stepped through the door, Michael’s attention now surely diverted from words of once.

Michael greeted the stranger, the stranger then turning to Calum to introduce himself as Michael’s emergency contact. Calum shook hands with him as he asked to speak with Calum in the hallway- against Michael’s incessant protests. They fled the room, Michael’s voice drowned out as Calum took the time to carefully close the door behind him with a final click.

“He’s going to be fine right?” Michael’s contact asked, an underlying and yet all too obvious worry creasing his features.

Calum looked at Michael’s contact, his caramel hair in curls, his hazel eyes holding concern to the extreme degree. Calum let out a breath and nodded his head, “He’s very lucky, he should make a fully recovery, but it’s going to take some time.”

Michael’s emergency contact nodded in his own understanding at the words, his own words seemingly escaping him as he thought it all over, even Calum had begun to veer off track and lose his way of articulation as he looked over to the window, his soulmate fidgeting in the hospital bed. When he turned back, a knowing look had captivated the man’s features with just a dash of confusion sprinkled in.

“Do you know each other?”

“N-no, no,” Calum stuttered, not particularly lying, but maybe not wholly telling the truth either. Though he was ninety percent certain he’d never met Michael before this day- hence not knowing him- that ten remaining percent was persistent and nagging, as if he should know it, should be able to recall why Michael looked so familiar, but all together it fell flat. So for the sake of Calum’s sanity and the formality of answering the question, no, Calum didn’t know Michael.

“Ashton?” Luke’s voice drifted down the hallway, the pair turning to take in Luke’s presence. The man’s face lit up, one of the easiest smiles quickly taking control of his features, Ashton- apparently- already moving towards Calum’s friend as they met in the middle.

It all clicked with Calum, Ashton being the person Luke was seeing, such a small world surrounding them. Calum watched the two converse until Ashton broke away and entered Michael’s hospital room, taking a set next to the bed. Calum was utterly baffled at the turn of events his afternoon had brought him. He could never have predicted the outcome of his day when he woke up that morning and had to drag himself out of bed, a cup of coffee and persuasion dragging his ass into work.

“How does Ashton know him?” Luke asked as he sidled up to Calum’s side, the pair now watching through the one way window together.

“He’s Michael’s emergency contact,” Calum explained dryly, his throat gone just a touch numb as everything sort of collided together for him.

The reality of it all was starting to wash over Calum, the fact that his soulmate was just measly feet away from him, the fact that his soulmate did not know he was his soulmate, yet that undeniable nudge of familiarity. Calum couldn’t place it all, he was boggled, his mind was just a haze of mass confusion, his feelings were washed clear yet foggy and undecipherable. He went through the rest of his work day in that state, with just an edge of denial trying to overcome him, but he knew it was real, _too_ real.

*

Calum attended to Michael while he healed in the hospital, changing his bandages, fluffing his pillows, generally taking care to be attentive- more attentive than what was called for- with him. It felt undeniably right, even though Calum wouldn’t- _couldn’t-_ tell Michael why. Just because Calum had the knowledge of their ‘connection’ didn’t mean Michael did as well, it didn’t mean Michael wanted to know either. Calum figured it was better left unsaid, Calum always had the mindset that soulmates were of choice, if Michael wanted to know he’d have found out on his own terms. Calum didn’t want to be the one to spoil it for him. He wanted ultimately to give it time, to see if they actually connected in that way, without the intrusion of that nagging little fact. He just wanted to _feel_ it. Not be told he was.

He was just clearing off the whiteboard on the wall with all of Michael’s daily details for recovery when Ashely wheeled him in, his now casted and broken leg propped up in the wheelchair, his healing body already starting to look a million and half times better. Michael declined help getting back into his bed, instead his stubborn pride having him fumble into the sanctuary of sheets, his hospital issued gown getting tangled beneath him. He harrumphed a moment until he had twisted himself free and was sat comfortably, a small eyebrow raise at Calum and a slight chuckle noting that he was fine but if anything a little disgruntled.

“You alright?” Calum checked, Michael immediately nodding.

“Perfect,” Michael responded. “I’ll be even better when I’m out of here though.”

Calum sighed and shook his head, “Only a couple more days, I promise.” Michael waved it off, content to lean back into his pillows and let his eyes wander, his pale face looking quite pained with a small sheen of sweat coating his forehead. “How’s the pain?”

“Bearable,” Michael lied, stubbornness coursing through his veins. If there was one thing Calum had learned of his soulmate thus far, it was of his astounding ability to be the most stubborn person on the face of the earth, his resolve unshakable, his priorities set. It was sort of admirable, the way Michael was able to hold his own in any situation. Calum found himself smiling whenever the red head would go head to head with the doctors, fighting what they said every step of the way. Usually, when patients were that way, it annoyed Calum to no end, he just wanted to them to listen and get better as fast as possible, but the way Michael went about his arguments was so unorthodox, trying to bargain with the doctors for leeway.

“I’ve just got to change your bandage and then I’ll leave you alone,” Calum promised, his fingers running ever so lightly over the bruised arm, finding his way to the gash to promptly get rid of the old wrapping and replace it, while the contact was becoming routine and was barricaded by rubber gloves it never failed to spark something within Calum. He couldn’t imagine the touch without the block, he knew the reaction would be visceral, set deep within his bones, indefinitely screaming at him things he should already know.

“You don’t have to go so soon, do you?” Michael asked, another of his learned habits shining through.

Michael had the oh so beautiful tendency of not so subtly flirting with Calum, Calum figuring it was his personality and that he treated the other nurses much the same; his friendliness spread among the hospital. Calum didn’t mind the flirting, in fact, it made his stomach flutter every time Michael wanted him close. He knew his cheeks heated every time innuendo’s slipped from the bold boy’s mouth, keeping in mind the fact that he was actually feeling these things, Michael also having the amazing ability to make Calum forget all of his worries. When Calum was with Michael, that’s exactly what it was, he was with Michael, not his ‘soulmate’, not an unrealistic expectation of a relationship, he was just with a real person who had somehow amazingly made Calum feel _real_ things.

“I’ve got another patient to check on before my shift ends,” Calum explained, Michael looking up at him through his eyelashes, puppy dog eyes at their finest. Calum loved puppies, so sue him for absolutely melting whenever Michael threw him that look. “But I can come back for you.”

Michael brightened as Calum relented, Calum knowing that awful feeling of being alone. He lived on his own, the dark of the night always creeping up on him and surrounding him, a crushing disparity of loneliness inevitable in those hours. Calum could thrive when getting the chance to be alone, needing time to recharge himself, completely okay with moments to himself, but sometimes the silence of solitude got to him, sometimes he craved interaction that meant something. While Calum knew Michael wasn’t by definition alone in the hospital- nurses flitting in and out of his room more times than he could count in a day and Ashton stopping over anytime he had the chance- he also knew that some words could be broken down to feelings, simple definitions crushed into dust and sprinkled over yourself.

Calum had finished Michael’s bandage change and left him with the promise of coming back to check on him one more time before he went home, a bubble bursting in his chest having the corners of his mouth turning up into an honest to God smitten grin as he checked on his last patient. The old lady was one of Calum’s other favorite patients, her eccentric personality and witty words never failing to keep Calum entertained. Even she could sense the change in Calum, and maybe because she was who she was Calum was okay with it when she called him out on the mood shift he’d had lately. Calum had always, _always_ , been cordial and friendly with his patients, but as of late- since Michael had been checked in- she had relentlessly pointed out the fact that he was undeniably jaunty.

“I don’t know what’s done it, but it’s nice to see you this way,” she said softly as Calum finished his round and was about to step out the door.

He smiled in acknowledgement and shut the door, taking a moment to let the words resonate within him. He knew it was true, Michael was already having quite the effect on him. He quickly made his way back to Michael’s room, the red head resting his eyes in the dim room, Calum procrastinating outside his door for a moment, not wanting to wake him if he was tired. He nonetheless opened the door just as Michael opened his eyes, an appreciative turn of the lips greeting Calum immediately.

“You came back,” Michael stated.

“I promised I would,” Calum responded, taking a seat on the plastic chair next to Michael’s bed as they fell into conversation.

The moon and the stars were shining in through the thin curtain on the window, the night settling quite serenely around them as they talked of nothing and everything all wrapped into one. No topic seemed to be off limits for them, Calum divulging into details of his life he hadn’t shared with anybody, the easiness that came with talking to Michael having him opening up parts of himself he thought he’d had closed up. These conversations with Michael were refreshing and rejuvenating, bringing back parts of the person Calum had missed since moving. He felt young and free within the confines of the walls he was in, he felt as if he wasn’t bound to one meaning or following one path.

They had momentarily lapsed into a lull in the conversation, Calum leaned back in his chair, content to stare at Michael fondly. Michael rolled his head to the side, meeting Calum’s gaze straight on.

“What?” Michael asked, catching Calum in his act of staring.

“Nothing,” Calum quickly replied, blushing furiously.

Another moment of silence washed over them until Michael cleared his throat and cocked his head to the side, a flicker of something in his eyes, “This is nice, thank you.”

Instinctively Calum reached his hand out, with a touch as soft as a whispered secret he placed his hand over Michael’s. He was absolutely right about the effect of the touch, shivers running up his spine in a glamorous dance. Michael’s hand lifted into the touch, his eyes glazed over as he bit his lip and laced their fingers together tentatively.

“You’re so familiar,” Michael whispered. “It makes me feel better.”

While Calum didn’t say anything, he responded in a way that made him feel better; a light squeeze to Michael’s hand.

*

Calum tugged at the elastic waistband of his scrubs, lifting them up before tying them a bit tighter, procrastinating the inevitable. It was Michael’s last day in the hospital, and while that was amazing news, it also meant it was Calum’s last day with Michael. He had the discharge papers nearby, a few final signatures and Michael would be free to walk out of the hospital for good, and consequently, also Calum’s life. He didn’t think they would actually fade away from each other that easily, but doubts weigh heavily, especially when they’d only known each other such a short time. They had their own lives, already intricately woven without each other intertwined within.

He shook it off though, rolled his shoulders back and collected the papers, headed towards Michael’s room. He knocked lightly, the blinds drawn on the window, Calum unsure if Michael was presentable. Michael called out for entrance a moment later, Calum composing a smile as best he could.

“Today’s the big day,” he said as he entered, taking in the sight of Michael. His hospital gown had been replaced by his regular clothes; shorts that didn’t interfere with the cast on his leg and a cut off shirt with a band logo on it, crutches supporting his weight.

“I suppose it is,” Michael said affirmatively, elation coating the words until he stopped and _looked_ at Calum, his ever inquisitive eyes able to understand things even Calum was having a hard time working through.

“Here,” Calum said, hanging the papers and a pen over to Michael. “Just need your signature and you’re free to go.”

Michael took the clipboard and signed his name where it was appropriate, his eyes peeking up to steal a glance at Calum, “Keep in touch okay?”

“Of course,” Calum said without hesitation, reaching for the papers.

“I didn’t give you my number for nothing,” Michael reiterated with a chuckle, making Calum instantly blush, the undertone of the words sultry when paired with the way Michael was ravishingly looking at him. Michael hobbled over to the door, his crutches hitting the tiled floor with thuds. Once he reached the door, he turned to face Calum one last time, “Are you sure we haven’t met before?”

The question took Calum momentarily off guard, it wasn’t totally unexpected, but it was a bit jarring to finally hear. Calum himself had thought the question an abundant amount of times. A lot of thought had gone into placing the feeling of knowing, but he had come up empty handed each time. He’d had himself convinced his mind was playing games with him all because of that damn soulmate match.

“I don’t think so,” Calum answered after a few seconds of thought.

Michael looked downcast as he answered, “Right. Okay. Don’t be a stranger then.”

“I won’t,” Calum called after Michael softly as he joined an awaiting Ashton in the hallway, Calum watching as they set off carefully towards the exit.

Calum kept that last moment of interaction with him all throughout his shift, carried it home with him as he stared once more at the yet to be unpacked boxes. His eyes found the discarded walkie-talkie, a more urgent feeling overcoming him as he stared at them. He knew there was something huge and glaringly obvious that he was missing. It was staring right at him and yet he still couldn’t figure it out.  He scratched the back of his head as he contemplated, nostalgia building in him as he tried with all of his might to place what might’ve been. The memories that did restore themselves within his mind were fleeting and as cloudy as a storm; dense and darkly saturated with no near end in sight.

He gave up trying to place the memories as he crawled into bed, resigning himself within the cotton sheets, exhaustion weighing his eyelids. He thought, maybe, if he stopped thinking about it so much, the answer may come to him, perhaps unconsciously, in the form of a vivid dream. When he woke though, he was much disappointed to find out he couldn’t remember what had transpired in his mind as he entered the realm of sleep. All he could recall was darkness and then the light, filtering in through his open curtains and drawn blinds. He groggily had wiped the sleep from his eyes, an overwhelming self-reminder that Michael would no longer be at the hospital when he got there having him dragging his feet more so than usual, all until he and Luke got off work and headed for the bar, glad he had a later start to his day tomorrow.

He sat on the barstool, swishing his alcohol absentmindedly as he listened to Luke, glad to be out of his own head for a while. Luke was talking about Ashton again- no surprise there- but this time, he spoke of a fight- nothing but surprise there. In the time Luke had been seeing Ashton, Calum couldn’t recall even a single tiff they had had. Calum listened though, even more intently than when Luke droned on and on about how wonderful their relationship was.

“He’s just so stubborn,” Luke finished, an exhale of relief from the blond as he got all of his rant off his chest.

“That’s too bad,” Calum said, trying to maintain sympathy over pity in his tone. Luke was never one to respond well to pity, Calum couldn’t blame him though, it was almost dehumanizing in a way; very condescending in his book. “I thought you guys would be soulmates.”

Luke looked confused at the latter part of the statement, “What do you mean?”

“Didn’t you say you felt like he could be ‘it’ for you?” Calum questioned, confused on his own terms of where this conversation was headed.

“I still do feel that way, Cal. It was just a fight,” Luke elaborated.

Maybe Calum had had a little too much alcohol and that’s why none of this was making sense, or maybe he just purely wasn’t educated on soulmates the way he should be. He’d seen his mom and dad growing up, they seemed perfect, happy as could be, they never fought; at least he would come to realize they’d never fought in front of him.

“But aren’t soulmates supposed to be perfect fits for each other?” 

“That doesn’t mean we don’t have differences,” Luke began. “We’re different people, Calum. We’re never going to agree on everything, in fact, I think our differences are what fuel us to be so perfect for each other. We round each other out. But sometimes those differences come head to head and we fight, sometimes we don’t see the same color. But if it’s meant to be you can always find common ground. There’s always a gray area.”

“Okay, Oh Mighty Wise One, I see where you’re coming from. I get it. But what does it feel like to know he’s the one?”

“I don’t know for certain, not yet anyway, but I think it’s just in the way I feel when I’m around him. It shows in the person that I am when he’s around, I just- I instinctively feel better. It’s like second nature or something,” Luke explained and then narrowed his eyes in suspicion. “Why do you want to know?”

Calum sighed and with it let out all of his troubles, exhausting all of the compressed emotions he’d garnered up since finding out Michael was his soulmate, “You know Michael right?”

“Sure, Ashton’s roommate.”

“Well, when he was checked into the hospital unidentified I had to run his prints. I sort of maybe found out something really personal about him and myself in the process and part of me regrets it but the other part sort of wants to pursue it.”

“Are you saying what I think you’re saying?” Luke questioned, a raised eyebrow indicating his suspicions were about to be proven. 

“Are you thinking what I’m saying you’re thinking?” Calum tiptoed around the subject, wanting to leave it as broad as possible but Luke was having none of it, an unimpressed look prompting Calum to come clean. “Yes, okay. We’re soulmates. Or at least that’s what the damn computer said. I don’t know Luke, I don’t. I sometimes feel like we could be, there’s honestly something so right about him, but then again I can’t totally convince myself I’m feeling these things because they’re there not because they’ve been put in my head by the idea of soulmates.”

“Calum I think you need to calm down, take a deep breath, chill, okay?” Luke soothed, capturing Calum’s full attention, lulling the build-up of frustration.

“What do I do?” Calum asked, defeated. 

“First of all, you need to disregard whatever the computer told you. Forget it ever happened. Just push it out of your mind as best you can. Now, ask yourself, do you like being around Michael?”

“Of course,” Calum answered instantaneously. That was a no brainer for sure.

“And do you want to pursue something more than platonic with him?”

“I think so,” Calum answered.

“I don’t pay for your thoughts. Yes or no?” Luke insisted.

“You don’t pay for anything,” Calum reminded with narrowed eyes. “But… yes.”

“Then what the hell are you waiting for?” Luke asked.

“What if he doesn’t feel the same?” Calum questioned, the real worry finally coming to light. He could handle knowing who his soulmate was, he could realize that what he was feeling was real, but he knew it would destroy him if Michael didn’t reciprocate those feelings.

“What’s worse, trying and failing, or not trying and never knowing; letting that question consume your thoughts until the day you die, until you spontaneously combust because you couldn’t take it anymore, because you didn’t buck up and tell the truth? It’d be written on your gravestone, ‘died from combustion’.”

Calum titled his head in disbelief at the extremities Luke was going to, but got the message loud and clear, “Well when you put it like that…”

“Then get your phone out and call him, or spontaneously combust, it’s your choice.”

Calum reached into his pocket for his phone but then shook his head as he realized the time, there was no way he could just casually call Michael this time at night. He’d save it for tomorrow, directly after his shift, even telling Luke about it so he could hold him accountable if he chickened out.

They discussed game plans of how it would go; possible outcomes and ways of going about it all as they walked home, Luke living only a couple blocks over from Calum. They got to Calum’s apartment complex, about to bid each other farewell when Calum remembered something very important.

“And don’t think I didn’t hear that little yet you slipped out.”

Luke laughed, “Of course you caught that.”

“When were you going to tell me you’re going to check your prints?”

“Ash and I just decided the other day. I mean, I guess it was just a matter of time before it happened anyway, huh?” Luke brushed it off as casually as he could.

“That’s what you want?” Calum asked, knowing Luke used to be of the mindset that it didn’t matter.

“Yeah, it’s a mutual decision.”

“Let me know how it turns out,” Calum said as he entered his building, shutting the door behind him after Luke’s affirmative nod.

 _Mutual;_ unlike the way he’d found out about Michael.

*

A whirlwind of commotion had broken Calum from his thoughts and daily routine at the hospital, doctors rushing in and out of the ward, the double doors opening automatically a stretcher being rushed in, papers scattered about the desks flying in the wind the commotion provided.

“Code Red, we have a Code Red,” Calum overheard, his body tucked neatly into a doorway to take up as little space as possible.

Something ticked and clicked within the back of his mind, the words nagging at him, persistent as ever as they dug up lost memories. His hands grasped at nothing, his fingers forming around air as if he was holding onto something. Frustration of the loss of memory had bogged him down, but now, he was starting to recall, flashes of a time long ago stampeding to the forefront of his mind. The commotion continued as he reached out for the memory, his arms outstretched and ready for an embrace of victory, hearing a younger version of his voice repeat the words the doctor had said. Picturing his smaller self with a walkie-talkie within his grasp, his mouth pressed up against the speaker, his finger holding down the call button.

As he fully immersed himself in the memory the white walls of the hospital fled, the sterile air turned to that of a salty breeze, the cacophonous noise of the hospital dying around him, turning into the soft sounds of the sea, the waves gently lapping onto the shore. In his young hand was the infamous walkie-talkie, pressed up to his mouth as he heard his prepubescent voice call out for his own Code Red. On the receiving end of the walkie-talkie he could hear a familiar yet indistinguishable voice call out a meeting place. He hustled across the beach, stirring up sand as he ran away from where his family was sat on towels and beach chairs.

They’d met next to the pier, a blond and young Michael greeting Calum with a toothy grin, the other walkie-talkie in his clutches. They’d fallen to the sand, laughing and out of breath from the trek across the beach. They’d designated the spot as their meeting place when they’d met under it just a week ago. Their families had both dragged them away from their homes for a vacation, Calum immensely happy that Michael had befriended him the second day they’d been there. Michael had spotted Calum just outside the perimeter of the pier, the older waving him over to engage him in a conversation of meaningless proportions, but it meant the world to Calum that he had so easily and rightfully wanted to be friends with him.

“I beat you,” Calum giggled as he pushed himself up, sand falling from his back in a shower.

“Barely,” Michael argued, harrumphing as he adjusted to sit cross legged in the sand. “I had farther to run anyway.”

Calum repeated verbatim what Michael had said, eliciting an easy chuckle from the older boy, “Barely.”

They’d spent the rest of the day together, adventuring around the beach, dipping into the water when the sun became unbearably hot, using their walkie-talkies to spy on Calum’s older sister; playing spies one of Calum’s favorite games. Only when their parents had called them back for dinner did they part, promises of meeting up tomorrow on the tips of their tongues. They had met up the next day, and the day after that, but after that, Calum had been dragged home a day early, not able to bid Michael farewell before it had happened. He remembered sitting bitterly in the backseat of the car, kicking his legs into the front seat before him, upset that he didn’t get Michael’s phone number, the walkie-talkie already packed and forgotten about.

Calum was pulled out of the memory and came tumbling back into his own reality, the hospital buzzing around him, his mind processing where he needed to be and what he needed to do. He set off, with the feeling of connection and victory clicking together. He knew that Michael had been in his life before, he could feel it in every touch between them, and in every gaze they shared. The question was; why couldn’t he remember it? He figured it was time masking the recognition, they’d both grown, they’d become their own people. A two week friendship had quickly slipped away from them, mangling the way Calum perceived the events. A haze had been brought over that vacation, the whole time span temporarily forgotten to Calum as he got older.

He hurried home once his shift ended, his promise to himself not forgotten as he walked in the door, his phone in his hand. Something didn’t feel right about the situation though, something was indefinitely missing from this scenario, a scenario in which Calum would call out to Michael, to reconnect with his long lost soulmate. He discarded the phone onto the counter as the still active walkie-talkie caught his eye. He walked over to the box and in a futile attempt, grasping at nothing but broken and mangled straws, Calum reached for the device and pressed the call button, his stomach surging with nerves as he shakily brought it to his trembling lips. It was a shot in the dark, not sure they’re frequencies even picked up on each other anymore, not sure if Michael even had the device in his possession. But the rewards outweighed the negatives and so Calum called out to him.

“Michael?”

He waited a moment, put the device on the counter and sat, staring it down menacingly until he picked up once more and called out for his soulmate yet again.

A few seconds went by with nothing but silence until a rough voice answered back through static, “Calum?”

Calum’s heart soared and swelled with exultation, every fiber of his being rejoicing in happiness, salty tears welling in his eyes as he blinked them away and with a more steady hand pressed the little button down once more.

“We have a Code Red,” Calum sang into the walkie-talkie, hoping and praying that Michael would understand what he was trying to say.

Another moment of pause happened and Calum’s soaring heart sank, thinking that their connection had been lost until Michael’s voice rang out once more, “ _The Pier_ on First Street in ten.”

“Affirmative.”

*

Calum strolled up to a restaurant so tactfully named _The Pier_ with a couple of minutes to spare, his hands shoved into his jacket pockets, his breath visible in the night air, the shaky exhales puffing into the light of the street lamp above him. A soft hand on his shoulder had him turning to meet the eyes of Michael who looked guarded. In Calum’s mind this moment played out much differently, Michael would have raced to him, their lips connecting, their lives intertwined, their breaths shared under the moon. Instead, Michael stood in front of him with an unreadable expression, his green eyes boring into Calum’s own brown ones. Words had evaded Calum until Michael gestured towards an outside bench, indicating they should sit.

With a tremendous exhale Calum lowered himself onto the bench, turning his body so he could fully look at Michael who took a bit longer to settle himself and discard his crutches to the side of the bench.

“You finally remembered me, huh?” Michael asked, his voice composed and carefully neutral.

Instead of answering with a statement, Calum offered up his own question, “Why didn’t you remind me?”

“I thought it was something you should do on your own time,” Michael explained.

Calum lowered his head and fiddled with his thumbs that were laid on his lap, he bit his lip as he looked up, meeting those green eyes full force.

“Did you know this whole time?” Calum asked.

“Of course I did, it’s kind of hard to forget your soulmate,” Michael replied nonchalantly.

Calum immediately cocked his head to the side in confusion, his eyes widening as he processed this information. Michael knew this whole time. How, Calum was unclear on, but he had known, that was all that was important for the time being.

“When did you figure that out?” Calum investigated, needing answers.

“I knew since we were kids, I could just feel it,” Michael said, his healing hand reached out for Calum’s, his cold fingers running lightly over Calum’s knuckles. “But the doctor went over my chart with me numerous times while I was in the hospital.”

“Why didn’t you say anything about it?”

“For all of the same reasons you didn’t as well. I wanted you to feel the connection, I didn’t want to force it on you. Just because I feel one way doesn’t mean you automatically feel the same.”

Calum reached his free hand out, placing it behind Michael’s neck, his thumb reaching out to run circles into his jaw line, their eyes held and captivated each other’s.

“I do feel the same,” Calum admitted, his voice low and husky, unable to contain the raw emotion that prevailed within himself.

Michael nudged into the touch that Calum provided, his green eyes melting into a puddle as he inched closer and closer to Calum, their proximity driving butterflies through Calum’s stomach. Their noses pressed together first, minuscule movement so slowly and beautifully bringing them together. Their lips connected and moved together as one, Calum’s blood pumping furiously though him as he scooted closer to Michael, needing to be as near to him as he could be. They broke away only when the necessity of air had their lungs crying out, Calum burying his face into the crook of Michael’s shoulder, Michael’s hands running through Calum’s hair comfortingly.

“I’ve missed you,” Michael whispered into Calum’s hair as he held him, as Calum clung to Michael, never wanting to let go, never _ever_ wanting to forget him again.

“I’ve missed you too,” Calum sighed, running his hands up Michael’s back soothingly.

“Cal?” Michael asked, pushing back slightly, Calum lifting his face to come eye to eye with his soulmate, worry clear on his face as he waited for Michael to elaborate. “I think we have a Code Red.”

“What?” Calum asked, utterly confused at the turn of events.

“I’ve fallen in love with you and I can’t get up.”

Calum snorted audibly and rolled his eyes at the absolute cheesiness of the statement, not able to help the dry chuckle that pushed past his swollen lips. He tugged Michael to him, connecting their lips once more, mumbling against them, “You’re the worst. I love you so much.”

*

Calum sat in Michael’s lap, his bass in hand, practicing, getting back into the feeling of doing something he loved. Everything had sort of come together for Calum as of late; finding Michael, a promotion at the hospital, even time to immerse himself in music as he once had aspired to do. Everything just felt right to Calum, his life was going smoothly, he was happy. His friends were happy, Luke totally in love with his soulmate Ashton, being all sickeningly cute together, but Calum couldn’t truly be disgusted or mad at them, he knew he and Michael were worse tenfold. The first few months they’d been officially together, they couldn’t keep their hands off each other, no matter where they seemed to be, it was always the right time to display affection.

They’d cooled down after that a bit, rejoicing in the more private moments when they could be intimate together. Like right now, all tangled together with nothing but music to accompany them. Michael rested his head on Calum’s shoulder, his breath hitting hot against Calum’s exposed skin, Calum thinking to himself he wouldn’t want it any other way. He’d rediscovered lost parts of himself and while in the process gained himself an amazing person he could very happily and easily call his soulmate. Calum couldn’t think of a time when he’d been happier.  In Michael’s arms, Calum was happiest.

**Author's Note:**

> Come talk with me on [Tumblr!!!](lashtonsillusion.tumblr.com)


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